Monday, April 6, 2009

"What's amazing is when you can feel your life going somewhere, like your life just figured out how to get good, like that second"

During spring break I went to visit my friend Laura (Lauddi), who recently moved to Malibu, California. So basically, it was one of the craziest trips I have ever been on. I keep reliving all of it in my head, and can't believe that most of it actually happened. I am currently planning on when I can go back, which is not soon enough!!



This is a picture of Lauddi and her horse, Lucky Lady in front of the house they are staying at.







I am going to have to break the trip down into different posts because there is just so much to tell. Well first off I will start by how I prepared for this trip. I decided that my goal while I was in LA was that I would find Zach Braff and make him fall in love with me...or at least just get a glimpse of him. I am crazy I know, but he is the one person I wanted to see. I am obsessed with Scrubs, and think we are MFEO. Anyways, while googling, "places where Zach Braff hangs out" like a crazy person I came across a blog titled, "iamnotastalker.blogspot.com". I immediatly was drawn in. This girl basically finds all of the places where movies and tv shows were shot in LA and posts there addresses. She also posts where to find a celebrity. So while looking at her blog in amazement I stumbled upon a post titled "My So Called Life House". I immediately freaked out and emailed Summer with the news. This is one of our favorite shows of all time, so I knew she would be crazy and get excited with me.








So once I arrived in LA I decided that would rent a car for the week because Lauddi had to work during the day. I do not know what I would have done with out the rent car or my handy GPS system guiding me through my craziness. So the first place that I had on my agenda was the Chase house from "My so Called Life". It is located in South Pasadena and was pretty easy to find. It was crazy to be there in person. As I pulled up to the house I saw that the windows were wide open and I could tell that it was empty. So I thought to myself, "who cares what people think, I am going to get out of my car and walk up onto that porch and do a twirl like Angela Chase did after her first kiss with Jordan Catalano". So after calling Summer and getting a pep talk I did just that.












It is a great house, I met one of the neighbors outside who was extremely nice and took a picture of me in front of the house. He told me he has lived in his house for 30 years now, so I got excited and thought that maybe he remembered when the show was being filmed. He said that there had been several things filmed in front of that house so he didn't remember it exactly. However when I told him about the show and when it was filmed he then informed me that he remembered high school kids and a girl with red hair and a backpack...which would have been the one and only, CLAIRE DANES!! I know most will not think that this is a cool experience but to me it was!! Here are a few pictures of the Chase house.



Above is the how the house looked on the show, below you can see that it has been painted. I love this house!! I love the porch and the balcony, and the street that it is on.










I also stalked the Wonder Years Home which is in Burbank, the Father of the Bride house, which is in South Pasadena as well and finally the Sacred Heart Hospital, where they film scrubs. My next post will be all about my Scrubs experience, which lead to several fun events!! Here are a few pics.




FATHER OF THE BRIDE!!! This is one of my favorite houses. There are tulips lining the walkway, just like they planted them for the wedding in the movie. I tried to see the basketball goal in the driveway where they played one-on-one but could not see because it was in the back. That is my favorite part of the movie. Such a great house.













WONDER YEAR HOUSE!!! Can't you just see the Arnold's rolling around and wrestling in the grass, like they did during the opening credits?








SCRUBS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TO BE CONTINUED...







Friday, January 9, 2009

Top Ten Movies of All Time


(According to me)


The other day I was having a conversation with Tyler about great movies. As much as I love movies I thought it a shame that I could not actually pinpoint a favorite.

Here is my list of the top ten greatest movies from the last 25 years in the order that they came out.

10. Splash (1984)/Big (1988)

For me, these two tie for my favorite movie as a child. I used to wish that I were a mermaid so that Tom would fall in love with me and we could live together in the sea.







9. Forrest Gump (1994)

No big surprise that I loved this one, as well. It was so much more than just a story about a man from Alabama.

8. The Shawshank Redemption (1994)

Great.
7. Romeo and Juliet (1996)

DiCaprio and Danes are HOT in a modern take on the classic love story.




6. Titanic (1997)

Hate to love it. Fun to watch until the ship hits the iceberg. It breaks my heart every time.






5. Almost Famous (2000)

I didn’t even come to appreciate this movie until college when I used to watch it over and over again. It’s a classic to me.

4. The Pianist (2002)

The best WWII movie to date. Roman Polanski and Adrian Brody earned their Oscars.




3. Cinderella Man (2005)

Extremely entertaining true story about a boxer who never gave up. Always makes me cry.





2. No Country for Old Men (2007)

Unlike any movie I’ve ever seen. Beautiful, honest, and brutal.




1. The Curious Case of Benjamin Button (2008)

Reminiscent of Forrest Gump, it is the life story of a man from New Orleans. I found myself wanting to warp into his world. At three hours long, I still wanted more.






The Top 30 after that!
(There are so many to love)

Girls Just Want to Have Fun (1985), The Princess Bride (1987), Willow (1988), Dances with Wolves (1990), Thelma and Louise (1991), Jurassic Park (1993), Braveheart (1995), Elizabeth (1998), The Green Mile (1999), Gladiator(2000), Cast Away (2000), The Lord of the Rings Trilogy (2001, 2002, 2003), Bridget Jones’s Diary (2001), Catch Me If You Can (2002), Love Actually (2003), The Notebook (2004), National Treasure (2004), Brokeback Mountain (2005), Munich (2005), Talladega Nights (2006), The Departed (2006), The Holiday (2006), Once (2006), Knocked Up (2007), Into the Wild (2007), Seven Pounds (2008), The Dark Knight (2008), Sex and the City (2008)







Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Fire Drill

On the evening of October 28, something very scary happened to me. I feel it is my duty to share this story with you.

It was a beautiful night, and I had just taken the dogs for a walk. Of course, I had actually taken three walks because the dogs are so bad on the leash that I literally have to take them one at a time. (I could just take one dog and not worry about the other two, but then I feel guilty because I don’t want anyone to feel left out.) Anyway, when I got home from walking the dogs I realized that Buddy, my cat, was indeed feeling left out and was standing by the back door. He wanted to go outside and roll in the grass, which by the way is one of the cutest things ever! So, Buddy, Princess, Dawson, Riley and I were all in the back yard enjoying the wonderful fall weather. About 10 minutes passed. Then I rallied everyone up and we all went inside…

Cut to me panicking!

Something was definitely burning and there was a ton of smoke coming out of the kitchen. There was no one there to consult with, and my immediate impulse was to gather all the animals and run out the front door. I seriously considered it for about 5 seconds when my phone rang. It was my mom. “Mom, oh my god, something is burning in the kitchen, there is smoke everywhere, I don’t know where it’s coming from, I don’t know what to do!,” I screamed into the phone.

Then I looked closer, through the smoke, at the stove/oven panels…both off. I quickly opened the microwave…nothing. Then, I literally said out loud, “What the frick?” I was thinking to myself, ‘where the hell is this smoke coming from?’ Upon closer inspection, I finally realized that it was coming from behind the refrigerator. My mom, still on the phone, instructed me to pull the fridge out from the wall and unplug it.

I always knew my brute strength would someday save the day.

With the plug pulled, the smoke finally ceased and I let out a breath of relief. The refrigerator had somehow caught on fire and the plethora of foul-smelling smoke was the result of burning plastic.

I sat there for a minute, contemplating what would have happened had I not been there, or had the fire caught onto the wall and started burning down the house. It suddenly dawned on me how necessary it is to have a simple fire extinguisher on hand in case of a small fire. It seriously hit me how EASILY a fire can start. I was so lucky to have been there when this happened. It was a very scary feeling.

After this reality check, I called the landlord and waited for him to come over and tell me what the heck went wrong. When he arrived, he commented on the smell and was shocked at the amount of smoke that had accumulated in the house. After inspecting the back of the fridge, he concluded that there had been a short in one of the wires and that it must have been due to a defective part. He has since ordered us a new refrigerator and it should be here this evening.

Even though there were no large flames, and I caught the fire before it did any damage to the house, this fact remains; I was unprepared.

I now feel strongly that every household should definitely have smoke detectors and overhead sprinklers, especially in the kitchen. And, every household should have a fire extinguisher.

These simple safety measures could prevent insurmountable loss.

-Heather

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

"We are totally MFEO"

You might be wondering to yourself... what in the world does the phrase "MFEO" stand for? Well, in order for you to fully understand I will need to give you a brief history of where I first heard this phrase


MFEO is something that I picked up off the movie "Sleepless in Seattle". If you have seen this movie a million times like I have you might recall the crazy girlfriend of Jonah’s that abbreviates everything and at one point describes Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan’s characters as:
"MFEO…Made for Each Other" or sometimes I like to say "Meant for Each Other"








It was not until my sophomore year of college that this phrase resurfaced while my roommates and I were over analyzing or obsessing about a particular boy. The object of my obsession was most likely the A&M bus driver who resembled Brad Pitt from his earlier days in movies such as, "A River Runs Through It". I totally thought Brad the bus driver would stare at me through the rear view mirror every day while driving me home from my morning class, if I close my eyes I can still see him twirling that toothpick in his mouth. There was also a certain swimmer who came in everyday that I "patrolled" but really just stared at as he swam laps for hours while lifeguarding at the Rec. Oh and I can’t forget the boy who sat across the aisle from me in History of Rock and Roll. Lindsey was in that class with me and got to witness the crazy first hand, good thing she thought that his friend and her were MFEO as well. This helped justify my craziness. The funny thing is I probably said less than 5 sentences to all 3 of them my entire life, but I was still convinced that each of these boys and I were a perfect match.

I couldn't decide which picture was more beautiful....









At first all of my roommates and friends had the same initial question, "who says things like that and what does MFEO stand for?" Once I began to explain it to them I could see the light go off, or what my fellow teachers would say, that "a ha!" moment. Ever since then it has been part of our group vocabulary.



The phrase has already come up in our group blog and there have been a few questions from others regarding it. So I decided that this was the perfect opportunity to explain our crazy lingo and also compile all of the couples that I think are "Meant For Each Other".




Thus I give you the crazies:



Top 15 MFEO




15) Ryan & Rachel




We first witnessed their love story unfold in the movie "The Notebook". From the ferris wheel to dancing on the street without music, we loved it all. Once we found out that these two had a real life romance going on all seemed right in the world. They split briefly and it hurt my heart a little. Luckily on my daily check of people.com (don’t judge me) I saw that they reconciled and I immediately emailed to make sure everyone had heard the news. Close call.







14) Heather & Tom



Ever since I have known Heather Amman she has been in love with Tom Hanks. I used to go over to her house when we were in middle school and we would watch the movie "Splash". I would listen to her go on and on about how she should be Daryl Hannah, and how she was going to marry Tom one day. Heather may be engaged to someone else now, but I will always think that Tom and her are MFEO! Sorry Ty Ty.



Doesn't Heather kind of look like Daryl Hannah below?? yessss






13) Beyonce & Jay-Z



Like Bonnie & Clyde, Beyonce and Hov are meant to be. She is smokin' and needs a man or "Soldier" who will not compete with her hotness...just love her. This is why they make the perfect match.






12) Lindsey & George



Carrie Bradshaw said it best, "Clooney is like a Chanel Suit, he’ll always be in style.

I think Lindsey’s love for George escaladed our senior year of college. She still believes that if she meets him in the airport or at a pub that he would love her...and we totally agree! As you can see we like to encourage the crazy in our group.










George + Lindsey = MFEO!!!!










11) Felicity & Ben




I have to admit that these two were meant to be from the start. We all felt for her when she followed him to college and he didn’t remember her name. He called her crazy to her face and she kept coming back for more. At times I wished she would just get over Ben and go for Noel, but the force could not keep her away.





10) Audrey & Patrick



I think if Audrey had the choice to star in any movie it would be "Dirty Dancing", opposite Patrick Swayze of course! Audrey can quote every line of this movie, from "no one puts baby in the corner" to "I carried a watermelon?" She has also been found on occasion jamming out to "Time of my Life" by herself in her car. I think we all agree that she could pull off those moves and that she belongs with Patrick just as Baby belongs with Johnny.





9) Edward & Bella



"Can you still be a Christian and a Vampire?"~ Anonymous Crazy

These two originate from the popular vampire romance novels that have become the latest obsession among 14-16 yr olds… and a lot of adults around the world. I know this might sound weird but I have dreamt about this book (and know others who have as well…Hollie). Sadly as a 24 year old I am admitting that I am on "Team Edward", for now. I am still learning about Jacob. Also sometimes I secretly wish that vampires existed and that I would fall in love with one. I promise I’m not crazy.







8) Kendall & JC (yessssssssss)



Back in the day I was obsessed with a little known group called... N’SYNC!!!!!! Although I love me some Justin Timberlake, it was the dark haired, handsome other lead vocalist, JC Chasez that won my heart. I had his picture all over my room, his bobble head and I even made a wedding invitation in my high school French class for a project where he was my groom. Luckily one day my inner crazy was welcomed(thanks to my sister stalking their tour bus) and I actually had the opportunity to meet JC. As a result I have a paparazziesque picture that is one of my prized possessions.






7) Jordan Catalano & Angela Chase



"I just like how he is always leaning, like against stuff. He leans great"


Didn't everyone have a "Jordan Catalano" in high school ? It doesnt matter how old you are when you talk about him or remember him you regress to that 15 year old mentality.



6) Hollie & Matt

"Sweetness in Starlight" and "When Red Meets Blue" were written for Hollie. She is his future wife and is not afraid to let him know it.






5) JD & Turk

If you do not watch Scrubs or think that it is funny, well I can not be your friend. I will admit, I never watched this show until a couple of years ago when it began to play in syndication on late night. Now I know that I was missing out on so much, most of all the "bromance" between JD and Turk. I mean, what's not to love? They share a stuffed dog named "Rowdy", like drinking Appletinis, playing hide the saltine and are members of the mighty kites club.


Chocolate Bear and Vanilla Bear Foreva!





4) Anna & Enrique


"Do you know? Do you know?" Forget that Kournikova tennis chick already! Enrique and our Anna would look extra hot together. Our group all knows that Anna needs her a luscious Latino lover.




3) Justin & Britney

I had to include them even though they are ancient history. I still get nostalgic when I see an old pic of J and B. Brit should definitely pay dues to the LRC..."Life Ruiner's Club" because she is the one who ruined her life with the whole Justin Break up.
I do have to add that we are glad that Britney is back, we were always pulling for her.



MFEO = Wearing matching Denim outfits. yessssssss




2) Ross & Rachel



He’s her Lobster !







1) JAM ( Jim & Pam)



We love Jim. We like Pam. So we definitely are all for the JAM.







yessssss for gas station proposals. JAM! JAM! JAM!



Thursday, October 23, 2008

Movie Manners

Let’s talk about acceptable behavior for the movie theater.

First of all, people go to the movies so that they can see an actual movie. This means that they watch quietly and listen to the people on the screen so that when the movie is over they have a basic understanding of what happened throughout the story. That being said, going to the movies, and then talking to your friends for two hours while you are there completely defeats this purpose. As if that is not enough, talking during movies might be one of the most annoying things that any person can possibly do. This leads me to my point. I will state it very clearly for those of you who are guilty of this crime; subtlety doesn’t work with you, (like death stares and people yelling “Shut-up!”).

1) DO NOT TALK in the movie theater.

Moving right along, something has to be said about the “loud-eaters.” Now to be quite honest, loud-eaters are sick no matter where you are, but in the movies it’s enough to make you want to throw a bowling ball at someone’s head. The fact that pop-corn is a staple concession at movie theaters baffles me. Why would you want to sell a snack that makes that much noise at a place where people need to sit in silence to get the full affect? Not to mention the bag it comes in and all the noise those make. Then there are the plastic candy bags that people dig around in at five-second intervals throughout the duration of the movie…And just when you think they are finally done eating their stupid candy, they go in for the big finale (30 seconds of nothing but the crinkling of plastic wrapper as they search for the last skittle). When this happens you might find yourself unable to hear anything else as your ears focus in on this maddening sound. This is normal, as is the uncontrollable urge to scream.

2) Don’t be a “loud-eater.”

The next item on the list is something that really gets under my skin. People who sit directly in front of me when the entire room is otherwise pretty empty. Now, I think I speak for more than just myself when I say that arriving early to the movies is done to accomplish one main objective; to get a good seat. It is so very irritating to get there half an hour early, pick out the ideal location, (based on proximity to others, along with viewing distance from the screen) and as soon as you sit down a group comes and sits exactly where you have your feet propped up in front of you. Now, when the theater is crowded I will gladly put my feet down so that someone is welcome to sit in front of me. It’s a completely different situation when there are a hundred vacancies to choose from. Get a clue people!

3) ALWAYS choose a seat away from others when space permits.

On a similar note is the issue of seating when the theater is already crowded. If you are coming with several people you seriously might want to consider coming early. Like I said before, people arrive early on purpose so that they can get their seats and be done with it. These are the people who enjoy watching movies and they want to maximize the experience by sitting in a preferred location. Some people even know that they may have to use the rest room a couple of times, so they choose a seat on the isle. Whatever the reason, many people have motives behind their seat choices. Now, you movie-wreckers on the other hand, are completely different. You decide on a whim to go up to the movies because you have nothing better to do, and you bring all 7 of your best friends along, too. Of course, you aren’t early since you didn’t plan on movie night in the first place, and to your surprise there aren’t any empty rows left!?! The next thought that comes to your mind is something that you should ABSOLUTELY NEVER do.

4) NEVER ask someone to accommodate you by changing seats. (Anyone who gives up their seat to a movie-wrecker is an enabler)

This next concept also ties in with seating, as the previous two have. It is the simple concept of ‘realizing that the earth doesn’t revolve around you.’ I personally feel that if you show up after the movie has started then you don’t deserve a seat at all. Why should all the people who got there on time in anticipation of the show have to be disturbed, potentially missing important details, so you can find a seat? They shouldn’t! You are not entitled to a good seat if you show up late. People like you are the reason why theaters have the “broke-neck” seats. If you come in late the right thing to do is quietly slip in, sit in the front row, and endure your punishment. That way nobody gets upset at you and next time you’ll show up on time, if nothing else to avoid the physical pain and discomfort.

5) When late, you belong in the front row, period.

The last thing I want to talk about is very serious. It has been brought to my attention that many adults are scamming the theaters out of their money by sneaking child tickets at the electronic kiosks. This is stealing! Kind of. In fact, I have witnessed this on several occasions and even been peer pressured into doing it myself. I feel that I would never have behaved this way if it were not for the bad influence of my unlawful friends. Now that I have that off my chest I can give you the final rule.

6) Do not steal at the movies. And…do not pressure your innocent friends to steal at the movies.

Friday, October 17, 2008

"Of course you don't, sweetie. You're brand new"

Reincarnation is a funny thing; I don’t really understand the concept or the specifics of its function. Reincarnation has been pretty prevalent in our society and media lately…examples include the following…

a. Phoebe on Friends was a huge supporter of reincarnation (she even had the ability to remember her former lives as an army nurse during the Civil War, WWI, and WWII)

b. Britney Spears’ Every time video was about her dying and being reborn (however, this was definitely during the time where she was struggling through the crazy, but she is back now and that is a whole other topic on its own).

I do not think that reincarnation is something I actually believe in, but recently I was inspired to ponder the idea of what type of person I would like to be if I were granted a second life (or maybe it is my 5th, who really knows).

I have generated your basic top ten list of possibilities, starting with number Ten

10.Tina Turner – mainly so I can wear the gold dress and sing Proud Mary.

9. The Green M&M – she must get in to the best parties.

8. Vigilante Justice Officer – making a big deal out of small crimes, my specialty would be in Etiquette.

7. The Pope – so I could use all the “stuff” in the Vatican (meaning jewelry, gold, etc) and solve world hunger. Yes, it could be done.

6.Mockingbird – First I would automatically be famous because of the Book To Kill A Mockingbird AND because my whole reason for existence would be to “Mock” other birds and push their buttons, I basically do that now but it isn’t quite as warranted.

5. Shoulder Angel – I would be someone’s conscience and lead them in the direction of making positive, society benefitting decisions. I would wear a white robe, Jerusalem cruisers, a halo and I would play the harp and could melt one with my melodies.

4. Professional Ice Dancer – Why not? However, I would skate to awesome music.

3. Wilderness Expert - I would be able to survive under any condition, live in a tent and eat bugs. I could construct a boat out of a piece of string and a toothbrush.

2. Blue dot in the Dot Races – It has been statiscally proven that the blue dot has the highest Win percentage out of all the dots, so naturally I would want to be that one.

And for my number 1 choice …

I have decided that if I could come back as anybody I would like to be a…

1. Full-Figured Southern Black Woman who’s occupation was a Back up Singer and I would rock Solos at my church on Sundays.

The following requirements would also be imperative to fulfill my dream

I would have spiral curly hair
long acrylic finger nails.

I would require that all of my back-up singing attire had fringe on it so I could be like Tina Turner.

On Sunday I would always wear a big hat to church.

I do not think that I need to justify my decision on this because I think most would agree that this would be awesome!


Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Shop til You Drop…Off the Face of the Earth

By: Heather Ammann


This is going to be my first contribution toward the aforementioned “document” which we have come up with as a result of countless encounters with stupid, life-ruining people. Although Audrey has stated that we do not want to comment heavily on this topic, as not to ruin it for our fans, some of the posts from this blog may actually resurface word for word in said “document.” So, for all you die hard Crazies fans, beware…

*SPOILER ALERT*

Now, back to the topic, “I hate people.” I have said it before and I will say it again. It may sound harsh to some, but I personally feel that it is quite fair. People are the dominant species on this planet and we have infinite potential as living beings, yet I continually witness individuals around me who can not seem to get it together. Now, this could easily branch off into a discussion about the environment and how it is our duty to reverse the damage that we have done, but I will save that for a rainy day. I am here today to talk about Shopping Etiquette 101. I know, I know, it sounds trivial compared to saving the planet, but nonetheless it is important to the Crazies.

Some of you may be aware that until I got into education I worked for about a year and a half in the retail industry. I worked a little over a year at Ann Taylor Loft and for about 4 months at The Limited. It is because of these horrifying experiences that I have compiled the following list of rules for ALL PEOPLE ON THE PLANET to follow (if they possibly can…I do not think decency is too much to ask for).

#1 When you enter a store and are greeted by a friendly sales-associate it would be nice of you to acknowledge that person in return. That person, the friendly sales-associate, is there to make you feel welcome in the store so that you might enjoy your shopping adventures. It is very rude to ignore someone when they are talking to you, which is something that we all should have learned when we were 6. Needless to say, grown women, pushing strollers through malls everywhere, are purposely ignoring friendly sales-associates near you…thus turning them into “snobby” sales associates. If you want nice sales associates don’t start the “snob” chain-reaction in the first place.

#2 When you are browsing through racks of neatly hanging garments, and tables topped with nicely folded stacks of attire, consider for a moment, if you will, that those clothes did not hang and fold themselves. Yes, there is actually a person, who gets paid next to nothing, to stand in high heels for 4 hours at a time while folding each individual sweater, and hanging every single pair of pants. Question: Have you ever had a sales associate come up to you, as you are wreaking havoc on the store, and ask, “Can I help you find your size?” You may have wondered to yourself why they think you need help and replied, “No, thanks…I can do it myself.” Here’s a little clue…that person WANTS to help you because it will save them from having to re-fold everything you touch. Little did you know that you were building enemies with each swipe of your reckless little hand.

#3 If you decide to swing by the mall in a time crunch to make a last minute purchase, and find yourself frustrated because you end up waiting in line at the register, GET OVER YOURSELF. It is not the store’s fault that you procrastinated, or that there are other people in this world who shop. There will inevitably be lines at the mall, especially on the weekends. Rolling your eyes and sighing as you stare at your watch does not make the line move any faster. And no, you cannot cut in line (waiting your turn is another thing you should have learned at 6). On that note, being rude to the sales person at check-out is not going to magically turn back time. In fact as soon as you leave you can guarantee that you will be talked about and laughed at for thinking that kind of behavior is okay.

The final, and perhaps most important rule…

#4 Just because you are at the mall and are preoccupied with shopping, that does not mean that you no longer have to monitor your children. The mall is a public place and therefore all parents need to keep their crazy kids under control. I know this kind of sounds like a given, you might be thinking, “Duh, everyone knows that.” But the truth is even the best parents seem to lose control upon entering the mall. It’s like the black hole for parenting skills. Kids are running around covered in ice-cream, screaming, messing up the clothes, playing with the mannequins, getting under the tables, sliding across the floor (seen it), posing in the windows (yep), skating all over the place with their weird shoes-with-wheels…you name it. Meanwhile, Mom and Dad are over picking out clothes like they came by themselves, completely oblivious to all the mayhem. Parents, this is completely unacceptable. If I have just described you or your children, shame on you. From now on it will make life much easier for others if you will just do all your shopping online. Seriously.

#5 Remember these rules if you don’t want to be hated.

(Don’t fault me for being harsh. I’m just telling you what you should already know.)